The Stuff You Only Learn By DOING

Since I feel like my first full week in Paris has been a bit all over the place, I figured this blog entry might as well mirror my reality. I’ve experienced a wide range of emotions – frustration, excitement, exhaustion, relief and gratitude. I’ve been overwhelmed, underwhelmed, and on a few occasions, just “whelmed,” should such a concept exist. But rather than recount the rollercoaster ride of my first seven full days, I thought you might benefit from a list of things that have as well as have not been expected from la vie à Paris.

Surprises:

1) I have my OWN bathroom – W.C. and shower. For many French families, there is only one, maybe two bathrooms shared by the apartment, and showers (especially fixtures that can be attached to the wall and that are protected by a door or curtain) are pretty rare to come by. Furthermore, the toilet is usually situated an awkwardly long hallway’s length away without a sink or garbage can. My W.C. may be down the hall from my own shower, but it actually has its own sink and is conveniently across from my bedroom door.

2) When we have dinner at home, I eat painfully slowly compared to my host family’s habits. I was under the impression that every French meal is one to savor and linger over; but despite the fact that I routinely excel at scarfing down food without giving my stomach the chance to surrender, my host family puts me to shame. And after consulting with my CUPA friends (those are the other Francophiles in my program), my experience is the norm. Interestingly, when Parisians go out for a meal, they take their time, but at home they move swiftly from course to course, leaving me to vehemently insist that I actually like the food am not, in fact, anorexic. Obviously, I’d be able to eat at a slightly faster pace if I didn’t have to work so intently on following the dinner conversation, or if I could use my fork more adeptly in my left hand, especially for things like string beans, penne and salad. (It’s super American to switch hands to use your fork after cutting up food, and even more laughable to be caught cutting salad.) One day, though, I will get to the bottom of why this stark difference between home meals and restaurant meals exists.

3) Despite the fact that the Metro goes everywhere, Paris is incredibly complicated to navigate for a newbie. I thought the great natural sense of direction that I inherited from my father would serve me well these first few days, but I was wrong. DC and New York are plenty big, but at least they have enough of a grid system so that you know when you’ve gone too far. How I long right now for each of the streets to be named by number or letter, rather than after a historical figure! This will change soon enough, but at the moment, getting lost and trying to correct it by going in completely the wrong direction is a huge fear and annoyance.

4) The Louvre is now free to anyone under the age of 26! I thought I’d be sure to end on a good note with this list, so if you fit the age range, get your butt over here before it’s too late!

Confirmed “Stereotypes”

1) Parisians all really do dress extremely well, especially when it comes to using accessories and relying on a black wardrobe. Most people know that the importance of good fashion has been at the center of France’s culture for centuries, but I learned recently the degree to which this cultural norm was enforced: in the 1700s, an architect had the idea to make the first major shopping center where the little street that ran through them all was covered (kind of like an indoor shopping mall). Although much of the Cour du Commerce no longer exists, we visited the remaining piece of it and it had all the charm you’d expect of Paris. (I’ll be sure to attach some photos soon!) The main reason this project transpired? So that all of Paris’ upper crust could parade through the area without having to cover up their expensive, beautiful dresses and jewelry with coats and other winter gear!

2) French citizens totally get away with eating like kings every day due to portion control. Whoever cooks dinner makes for each guest, say, one fairly generous-sized piece of chicken, and that’s it (aside from other side dishes). If you have a cheese course, you take a little wedge for yourself and put the rest away for another night. The best part is, you never leave hungry! I think I’m doing well with this portion control for two reasons so far: A) Since all the apartments in Paris are so small, especially compared to an American home in a suburb, you’re already curbed by the amount of space you have in your fridge and cabinets. B) Being a guest of a family, I’m conveniently super self-conscious to not stuffing my face. Should I find myself with my own family, it’s a completely different story!

3) It is near impossible for me to understand French people my own age. I know I might sound like an old granny here, but teenagers just don’t bother to enunciate anything! This I totally expected, however, so it’s not that big of a deal, especially when you think of how much slang young people use, even when they find themselves face-to-face with an American who’s likely to take your phrase literally, provided she was able to discern what you said in the first place. 😉 At CUPA we even had a little workshop on slang usage and idiomatic expressions. One type of slang that totally is over my head is what the French call verlan. Basically, it’s like pig-latin. For example, verlan itself comes from l’envers, meaning the inverse. So almost any word, depending on your group of friends can be inversed according to no specific rule and made into a cooler, almost non-French sounding word. By this rule, femme (woman) becomes meuf, fou (crazy person) becomes ouf and, my personal favorite that we learned, joint (as in, a marijuana joint) becomes oinj. What great things you learn in school! It will surely be a sign of improvement if I find myself using any one of these slang words with any semblance of ease after the next four months. (Though I assure you, oinj won’t be one of them!)

and finally…

4) The Eiffel Tower’s beauty and majesty is lost on no one, not even stern-looking locals who feign an apathetic air whenever the monument peeks out behind a building. I am lucky enough to be living in the 16^th arrondissement, where my closest metro stop is at Trocadéro, the plaza across the Seine that looks directly out onto the Eiffel Tower. After the sun sets, the monument lights up and sparkles for about five minutes every hour, on the hour, and on several occasions I have managed to exit my metro stop at the end of the day just as the tower lights up, as if to specially remind me every evening why I came here and to reassure me that each subsequent day will be easier in terms of cultural immersion.

I’d like to leave you with a favorite quote from a favorite movie that is currently inspiring me. Tom Hanks delivers it in A League of Their Own, after Geena Davis’ character says she’s quitting the baseball league because “it just got too hard”:

“It’s supposed to be hard. If it wasn’t hard, everyone would do it. The hard is what makes it great.”