I watched my host mama and aunt cook the liver from our howli, or sheep. My aunt gave me a chunk of the liver; I took a small bite and was surprised to like it. I had been nervous to try it but the texture reminds me of tofu and the taste is just a little salty. It is good in a new and different way; I think I would like it more if I didn’t know it was liver.
Today is Eid al-Adha, the Muslim holiday that celebrates Abraham’s willingness to sacrifice his son Isaac and God’s generosity in sparing Isaac by giving Abraham a ram to sacrifice instead. All around the world, Muslim families gather together and sacrifice a sheep (goat or cow) to honor God and this story. My family brought home a sheep on Tuesday and it lived in the corner of our tiled living room. This morning I woke up and got ready for the day while my Mama, Baba and brothers went to the mosque for special prayers. When they returned, my aunt, two uncles, and two cousins had joined them.
My uncle showed me the knife he would use to sacrifice the sheep as we enjoyed tea and cookies. The anticipation was building and I think even the howli sensed it. But then it was all over in a matter of minutes. My baba and uncle held the sheep down while my other uncle cut the howli’s jugular vein and it quickly went unconscious, bleeding to death. My mama and cousins stepped in with brooms to push the blood down the drain in the center of our living room. Once the howli was truly dead, the head was removed and it was strung up by its back feet. My uncle then proceeded to skin the animal, tail to neck. This was the part that took the longest but it still was quick and actually bloodless. The organs were then removed; everything besides the liver and some fat was disposed of into the trash outside.
I went to the kitchen to help my aunt prepare the special pita-type bread that we would eat with the meal. As I patted a dough ball flat, one of my uncles came in laughing and asked “are you sure you aren’t Moroccan?” I responded, “No I really am American, I just love to cook.” We laughed and he was impressed by both my skills in the kitchen and my willingness to observe the sacrifice. Throughout the whole morning everyone kept asking if I was okay, and I always responded yes. They were unsure how I would react to watching the sheep die. But I had been preparing myself for several days to witness this. While I am certainly an animal lover, in Morocco I decided to throw myself fully into partaking in this ritual. So I kept my distance from our howli, not naming it or petting it too much. My mama helped me understand that being sacrificed is an honor for the sheep because it is being used to honor God. From this perspective, I realized that Eid is a beautiful ritual to praise and celebrate God, not simply the slaughter of a sheep as one might otherwise conclude. Further, where did I think lamb came from in the US? Obviously someone has to kill and skin the sheep to provide meat to the stores. By sacrificing the sheep ourselves we were just doing away with the middleman – farm to table service at its freshest.
The best part of the day actually came a bit later when as my mama moved a potted plant to mop the floor and a small lizard ran out from behind it. She shrieked and the whole family cowered. My baba attempted to kill it with a broom but I intervened. I picked the lizard up and took it outside to safety. My family was surprised that I wasn’t scared of it, so I explained I had grown up with a family sometimes kept lizards and snakes as pets. They thought I was a bit crazy. I couldn’t help but find the humor in the situation since they had just sacrificed, disemboweled, and cleaned up the blood from a sheep yet me catching a lizard is what had raised eyebrows. All of us have our own traditions, interests, and special talents. I like and will protect lizards and my family is totally at ease with having a sheep carcass hanging in their living room. We may come from very different backgrounds but the important thing is that we respect each other, learn from each other, and find common ground.
