I have been trying to do the math for weeks. Manuela is turning 67… she was married at 19… but she was going to celebrate her 50th wedding anniversary, her boda de oro. It wasn’t until halfway through the fiesta that the truth came out: she and Santiago had decided to forego convention and celebrate while they were still young enough to do so. And celebrate they did.
I have been watching gifts arrive, the nerves surface, Manuela parade in white heels, the seating arrangements unfold… I always have a sense of foreboding that any sort of buildup will merely make the actual experience less than it could have been. I was wrong. There were moments at the beginning as Kate and I sat waiting in the car to go, or when we had no idea what was going to happen next and no one saw fit to explain, that I felt a little bit out of place. It was momentary.
They processed in like a wedding party: Santiago with Mari Carmen, followed by the “bridesmaids” and then finally, Manuela in all her ivory glory. The five children gave a toast, and I cried like a baby. I realized that it was more than a celebration of their time together, but of what they had built. The hijos spoke of the hardships Manuela and Santiago had faced but also the joy they had experienced and brought to their lives. I realized how each child in some way captured part of the essence of Santiago and Manuela, whom I have described at one point as a well-oiled machine. Their 50 years together (or rather, 50ish) speak for themselves. I can’t even remotely express how inspiring it is to see that even in Spain, basic truths carry over into everyday life. I still have yet to figure out exactly what their professions were, but I know for a fact that Manuela and Santiago’s biggest accomplishment is their family.
There’s really something to be said about that. My father came and spoke to my Neurobiology class last year. When asked about his profession and the difficulties associated with it, he bluntly stated that above all, the most important thing to him was his family. I can’t say that I would have always thought that to be true, having been young and unable to really comprehend something like that. As I watched the Vidal Sanchez family tearing it up on the dance floor—Santiago included—I realized while intermittently crying and laughing that the simplicity of that familial love and respect is invaluable. It has made my experience here worth every second I agonized over coming to Spain. And it isn’t just that I got to witness their family celebrate, but that they welcomed me in alongside them.
I’m the hija americana. My friends I have met through this program, Cassie and Ellen, constantly laugh at my obsession with mi familia sevillana. So many people grabbed me to dance with them. Manuela’s brother asked if she was sure I wasn’t Spanish. I was the recipient of endless kisses. I ripped the head off a gamba and was laughed at good-naturedly when I said I was nervous about eating it. And, by God, I could not contain the joy I felt for mis padres sevillanos.
This morning I woke up, went and sat with Manuela and Santiago as I ate my yoghurt and just chatted with them. It’s another normal, albeit rainy, day. I laid my head down at one point, and Manuela started scratching my back just as my mother does. I never imagined that I would be able to feel at home here. The director of CIEE told us to remember that we were part of the house, but not of the family. This has not been my experience, and because of it I have gained more value from my time here already than I could have otherwise. It isn’t about the schooling, or the language acquisition. This experience has become about getting an education on life, at least for me. When I was in Turkey last week, Megan sleepily told me that while she missed me, I seemed happy and she wouldn’t change it for the world. Happy? When can you simply say you are happy, no complications, no second thoughts? Only in Sevilla.
2 Comments to "Bailando por la vida: La boda de oro"
let me write you in spanish, please.
Hola, me me ha emocionado mucho tu relato. siempre me resulta emocionante cuando encuentro contenido de mi ciudad generado por gente que está tan lejos. pronto mi hermana se casará y se ira a vivir a EEUU, por lo que tendré una american family.
un saludo desde Sevilla!
HJustto say thank you for this interesting article! =) Peace, Joy.