My departing flight from Havana to Miami left four and a half hours later than it was scheduled to, a fact that meant I was scrambling to get through passport control, customs, and to my connecting flight in Miami before it left for California without me on it. Fortunately, I made it to my plane in time to be one of the last ones boarding, and was even able to stop to go to the bathroom and pick up some food before the long cross-country flight. Even though that sounds mundane and maybe irrelevant in the overall narrative of my long day of travel home, those two little tasks actually stand out in my memory of the day because the hour that I spent rushing through the terminal to catch my flight was one of the most overwhelming in my memory.
Two of the ways that Cuba differed most from the U.S. were in the areas of plumbing and food. At least, those were the two ways that the countries felt the most starkly different because they were differences that I faced everyday, multiple times a day. For example, every time that I went to the bathroom I knew not to throw the toilet paper into the bowl, and not to be surprised or deterred if there was already waste in the toilet because there was no running water that day to flush. In the U.S., neither of those things occurs frequently, if at all. Or, with regards to food, it became the new normal to have limited options, variety, and flavors, whereas those are defining characteristics of the United States and its food industry in particular. So, completing the relatively mundane tasks of using the restroom and buying food in the airport represented my reintroduction into the American culture of efficiency, convenience, choice, and consumption, which also happened to coincide with the time of year that American abundance and consumption is at its height, the holiday season. However, because I was so pressed for time, I was unable to really process all that I was seeing, hearing, and feeling as it was happening.
My mind was torn between the stress of rushing to get to my flight, the intense familiarity of the whole scene and the intense discomfort of just seeing so MUCH. It was a complete sensory overload. However, the fact that I had to complete those tasks of using the restroom and buying food relatively quickly meant that I was forced to mentally channel my old habits from before going abroad and rely on those in order to get the tasks done and get to my plane in time. It was kind of like running on automatic pilot because I was completing these tasks without error but, at the same time, my mind wasn’t really engaged due to the fact that it was so desperately trying to process the overwhelming and unfamiliar scene. As a result, to my great frustration, I began to understand just how easy it is to slide back into life in the U.S. and all the comforts that that entails (i.e. fully and efficiently functioning bathroom, and a variety of food options).
It was almost as if all the habits I’d just cultivated over the course of the semester just disappeared or faded away because of how much easier it had just become to complete even the simplest of tasks. Even though I was extremely frustrated with myself at first for the fact that it was so easy to readjust, I soon realized that it was one final way for Cuba to show me just how privileged I am. This is because, at the end of the day, despite spending four months living in Cuba with all the hardships that doing so entails, I was ultimately able to leave, to go to another country that does have reliable plumbing and an abundance of food/food options, a privilege that many Cubans wish they had but will never get.
Therein lies the most important way that Cuba changed me. Namely, it gave me an awareness of my vast privilege and all the ways that it manifests in my life. That understanding about privilege is a powerful tool that will allow me to be able to make a positive difference in the world even if it is just on a small scale, such as challenging it within myself or in my daily life. It has become evident that even if I do get used to the ease and comfort of American life again, which I for the most part have, my heightened awareness of privilege is one thing that will never fade, and for that I’ll be forever grateful.
